THE OFFICIAL BARD COLLEGE DEAN LEVINE QUOTE WALL MEMORANDA NON GRATA 3.0 FINAL EDITION I suggested to my wife and child Wednesday last that it doesn't get any better than this . . . . . . Before, during and following the meeting Dean Morgan, and I [sic] will take pleasure from hosting a "Salsa and Chips Festival". In addition, there may be a special reading of some sort to satisfy our youthful spirits. ["The Velveteen Rabbit"] . . . Tuesday evenings continue to brighten the Fall. March of Dimes event ranks a close second. . . . I apologize for this error and mourn the use of paper to correct it. . . . Alyssa Avery Stritzler-Levine was a surprise visitor at the open office hours this week . . . she asked later if the college pays me for having such a good time . . . I said yes. Next week is Reading Week. Let's hold our next tea and conversation on Tuesday, October 17th at 6 p.m. in my office. We are two members of the Bard Community who enjoy the atmosphere of the Kline Commons Main Dining Room. Lunchtime seems filled with activity, liveliness, and the food seems reasonable as well, but . . . and this is not a very pleasant "but," there appears to be an epidemic of thoughtlessness here at Bard lately. Students have been neglecting to bus their trays. This is a problem not only, as Abigail notes, because it keeps people at Kline working late cleaning up after students, but it also perhaps represents attitudes of an earlier century which we would not like to be associated with. Futhermore, and this is a very big furthermore, it is really inconvenient for individuals who must bus others trays themselves to make a clean place to eat. We, two members of this community, ask for a serious consideration of this matter. Fall has now turned to Winter. The brightening of Tuesday evenings is as important as ever. I, therefore, reinvite you to visit during open agenda office hours with tea and cookies. . . . The campus during January has been snowcovered and busy with many students living and working here. All in Ludlow miss the presence of the full student group. However, things are looking up: Only ten days or so remain before your scheduled return to college for the spring semester. It is therefore time for me to write about the start of the semester. . . I am writing to you with a note of concern after viewing your academic record for the Fall 1995 semester with the Registrar of the College. I must tell you that, at least on the surface, it appears your academic work of the last semester is below the level we expect from our students. I hope that this letter of warning will have a positive effect and inspire you to think carefully about your approach to academics at Bard in the coming year. You are the one who can best evaluate what needs to be improved and who must engage yourself intellectually to benefit fully from academics at Bard. "Academic slumps" can be caused by many factors and I understand that you may already know what these are. To the extent that I can offer guidance, I am happy to do so. Please take time to evaluate what you could have done better and where improvement is needed. Seek out the advice of those who are here to help you, notably your academic advisor and professors. If there are recurrent problems for which it is hard to find solutions, please come in to see me. I am hoping that you have had time to attend to any "unfinished" projects or papers before returning on January 30th, and most importantly that you have had an enjoyable winter break. I write to bring to your attention some important changes in the area of events scheduling and the use of the College Calendar. These changes have been worked on by a variety of people, and it is our hope that they will allow us to better organize our day to day and week to week activities. And further, we have an opportunity to do something positive in the area of ecology and conservation of resources. Finally, we have an opportunity to see if we can change our habits when it is important to do so. This memorandum will be put in everyone's campus box ... it is the very last one, except for emergencies and very special circumstances, which will receive this kind of distribution. Since I admit to being one of the major mass mailing persons, I feel my own anxiety as I write ... but all bad things must come to an end. From now on, I will only "clutter up" the weekly calendar or an official bulletin board on campus or your voice mail box or the e-mails with my communications. What follows is about a new method for scheduling and space reservation, and communications about activities and events and about the notes we want to have others on campus read. Most importantly, this communication begins and ends with a plea that we actually try a new way and that we seriously attempt to break old habits. I attach an information sheet that describes the specifics of "how to get the word out." I also attach a copy of the Campus Calendar Information Form which includes a section governing the room reservation system. Reading and using the system described in these documents should give everyone the means to plan and publicize events so they become all you want them to be. This material, I believe, does not require amplification. However, I would add that I know all the good reasons for sending out your own special announcement for an event or item you wish to bring to the Community. Everone wants to assure an audience ... you want to say more about your event ... you want to remind people on the day the event is scheduled. These are all good reasons but as I stressed at the outset of this communication we can accomplish these things in a different way. We can use the Campus Calendar, post the event on a managed bulletin board, and/or use the voice mail and e-mail systems. We can chose our word carefully and allow their power to bring an audience to those occasions we arrange for the Community. We all must do exactly this. I intend to do this. And I admit that I am one of the skeptics. Nevertheless, I intend to approach all of this with both confidence and optimism. I close with a personal tale of disappointment. Last semester, I held open office hours and tea every Tuesday evening. I sent out a note to the Community each time, for which I was justifiably criticized for the flagrant waste of paper. However, at times twelve or fourteen students showed up to talk and exchange ideas. The criticisms were, however, correct. This semester I relied only on the calendar -- two or three students show up. I long to go back to the old system to make those teas what I enjow them to be. I am, however, comitted to the new system, and I write to all of you this one last time in a campus-wide format. We need merely to read the calendar when it is published and distributed ... make our own weekly agenda and then not need a reminder on Thursday that something is indeed happening. I add one last time that my open office hours/tea are held on Tuesday evenings at 6:30 p.m. in my office in Ludlow. Please do stop by. SL:tmd:OTEM Memoranda have not been edited for punctuation, spelling, grammar or sense. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ "Dean Levine is a dustlove red fuckhead" author unknown "And God created Dean Levine. "And God spake 'Let the writings of this fair creature forthwith be written again, scratched into whatever medium is deemed necessary at the time, for all time, by those worthy to inscribe the velveteen force of his prose so that all may read and quake, for he is the rod through which I shall rule. He alone may speak my name.'" Pedro Rodriguez ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ We, the editors of the Dean Levine Quote Wall, regret that this must be the final installment -- for reasons that will be apparent from the last memo quoted above. The Community is, no doubt, very upset about this ... but it is important to give all possible support to Dean Levine as he "seriously attempts to break old habits." We will, of course, continue to track the Dean as he ventures into new media -- "the weekly calendar or an official bulletin board on campus or your voice mail box or the e-mails" -- and will resume publication if it seems appropriate. We admit that we are skeptics. Nevertheless we intend to approach all of this with both confidence and optimism. Until that time, if it does come, we urge all of you, the elect, to spread the Levine Gospel far and wide, to friends, family, and lovers, as a tribute to the e'er flowing streams of ink, cruelly dammed up by the Director of Recycling and the Dean of Students, which gushed from the golden pen of this Man of Letters. As token of our rage, we cry: LUDLOW DELENDA EST -- if only it wouldn't disrupt Tuesday evening tea and cookies. Sincerely, Dustlove Backspace Curator of Leviniana OTEM WorldWide "I feel my anxiety as I write ... but all bad things must come to an end." ------------------------------------------------------------------------------